Red Dead Online is both amazing and disturbing

[bio]

For those of you who aren't gamers, Red Dead Redemption 2 is a game about being a man of whatever morals you decide in the wild west of 1899.
It came with an online version (that you can now purchase all by itself if you don't want the crazy immersive story) where you can ride around with your friends (in a posse) and the internet as a whole (oh dear God!)... so all kinds of crazy things happen.... often involving a lariat. Yes, there are a lot of guns, but nothing says "Yeeeee Fuckin Hawwww!!!" like swinging a rope around and nabbing someone with it.

zzottt, Gooch, and I ride around quite often getting up to absolutely zero damn good, and we've found a lot of fun ways to dispatch those who cross us by using the lariat as our weapon:

• Tied up and placed on the train tracks (a classic... also, there are trains and they do come on time!)
• Tied up and fed to a pack of wolves (ugly death)
• Tied up and fed to a bear (quick death!)
• Tied up and fed to an alligator (you don't want to know!)
• Tied up and tossed off a cliff/mesa/grain elevator
• Tied up and set on fire (I want my baby back, baby back, baby back ribs!)
• Tied up and given a stick of dynamite to hold (for a short time)
• Tied up and tossed in the river right above a water fall
• Tied up and tossed into a lake (you sink)
• Tied up and drown in a mud puddle (a most indigent way to die)
• Tied up and then trampled by my horse
• Tied up and being drug through town behind my horse (screaming the whole time... until they expire)
• Tied up and then I kick you to death
• Tied up and then I beat you to death
• Tied up and then I stab you to death
• Tied up and having your head removed with a 12 gauge shotgun

The list goes on and on. I'm currently trying to tie someone up, drop them behind my horse, feed my horse, and have it crap on his face (yes, your horse will take a dump from time to time).

Did I mention this game isn't for kids? (it's rated "M" for a reason!!)

Oh, you can also hunt for pretty much every animal in North America and sell their bodies/hides/meat/teeth/claws/horns for money, do bounty hunts to capture wanted criminals (dead or alive) and return them (warm or cold) to the local sheriff, or just locate and return a stolen wagon to a struggling farmer.

I know that everyone here who is a gamer is already playing it, but for the other two or so of you... this game is stupidly fun! Upgrade your rig and come play with us!


Left: Me and my horse "Glue Factory", Right: zzottt and his horse (I don't know it's name, so lets just call it "Horsey McHorse Face")

[zzottt]

HAHA

my horse is named Horsey

[zzottt]

Moments before Bio meets his untimely fate. Its horrible that it ended that way but when I saw what he was doing with that coyote....




I just couldnt stand for that!

[bio]

Hehe... I wish I had taken screenshots of zzottt being chewed on by a mountain lion last night. Pure comedy gold!! Those things are both quick and vicious!

[zzottt]

the lion that ate you first? I was laughing so hard I couldn't aim right!

[bio]

the lion that ate you first? I was laughing so hard I couldn't aim right!

That would be the lion! I kind of had the same problem when it was chewing on you. They're nasty, but worth money if YOU DON'T FILL THEM WITH TONS OF HOLES first!

The lion in question wasn't worth squat after we each shot the crap out of it.

While this isn't us, it will kind of give you an idea of what problems you can run into with animals:

[bio]

Jerry texted me last night and I told him he needs to play cowboy too... so he downloaded the game.

The posse grows!