damaged people dot com

Congratulations on being the creator of a new
Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Soul Accumulation.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Evil - It's my nature

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first seduce a rock star. This will cause the world to sense a grave disturbance in the force, amazed by your arrival. Who is this evil genius? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in classic black?


Stage Two
Next, you must smash the Eiffel Tower. This will all be done from a obsidian citadel, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will spontaneously combust, as countless hordes of ninjas hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must send forth your arcane ritual, bringing about an unending cacophony of screams. Your name shall become synonymous with fuzzy bunnies, and no man will ever again dare take your lunch money. Everyone will bow before your dashing good looks, and the world will have no choice but to give you control of the planet.

What's your evil plan?

Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: World Domination.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Mom never loved me

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first incapacitate a town mascot. This will cause the world to choke on their food, overwhelmed by your arrival. Who is this really bad guy? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a corporate suit?


Stage Two
Next, you must seize control of the Moon (ooh, tides!). This will all be done from a abandoned church, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will wet their pants, as countless hordes of computer programmers hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must unleash your arcane ritual, bringing about a 1984 police state. Your name shall become synonymous with the spice girls, and no man will ever again dare interrupt your sentences. Everyone will bow before your overwhelming vvil, and the world will have no choice but to worship the ground you walk on.

Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Soul Accumulation.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: To show them all

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first seduce a chosen one. This will cause the world to whisper among themselves, overwhelmed by your arrival. Who is this criminal mastermind? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good as a dark gunslinger?


Stage Two
Next, you must sabotoge United Nations. This will all be done from a island of mu, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will fall into catatonic trances, as countless hordes of mad scientists hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must demonstrate your great supernatural forces, bringing about horrors beyond man's comprehension. Your name shall become synonymous with insanity, and no man will ever again dare refuse to be your prom date. Everyone will bow before your extraordinary charisma, and the world will have no choice but to make you their new god.

Congratulations on being the creator of a new
Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Destroy the Earth.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Sadistic pleasure

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first seduce a pope. This will cause the world to slaughter a sacred calf to appease the gods, unsettled by your arrival. Who is this sadistic fiend? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in your wizard's robes?


Stage Two
Next, you must desecrate the Eiffel Tower. This will all be done from a medieval castle, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will spontaneously combust, as countless hordes of winged monkeys hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must send forth your great supernatural forces, bringing about pain, suffering, the usual. Your name shall become synonymous with dear god no, and no man will ever again dare roll his or her eyes. Everyone will bow before your mind-boggling insanity, and the world will have no choice but to make you their new god.

Remind me to make this goal before the rest of you so I can wrap the Eiffel Tower in a protective, unpenetrable bubble.



Yes, I'm zee french

lmao, to be fair the Eiffel Tower is an amazing structure, i saw it on a school trip once... but yikes Paris knows how to charge for things!

Does that mean the streets smell like coffee, armpits, bread AND money?? Hmmmm... armpits and money

I can't wait to go to France. I might never come back.

Canada would work, too.

I recall there were not many French people in Paris. Lots of Africans. It's also the dirtiest city I've ever seen, even worse than NYC.

Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Destroy the Earth.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: To show them all

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first traumatize a town mascot. This will cause the world to swallow nervously, baffled by your arrival. Who is this ripe bastard? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a supervillain costume with gimmicks?


Stage Two
Next, you must desecrate the Internet. This will all be done from a underground secret headquarters of doom, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will spontaneously combust, as countless hordes of mean english teachers hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must tauntingly wave your secret death ray, bringing about a 1984 police state. Your name shall become synonymous with dear god no, and no man will ever again dare interrupt your sentences. Everyone will bow before your mind-boggling insanity, and the world will have no choice but to grant you three maidens of virtue true.

Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Criminal Activities.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Sadistic pleasure

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first clone a chosen one. This will cause the world to choke on their food, alarmed by your arrival. Who is this ripe bastard? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in classic black?


Stage Two
Next, you must poison the Pyramids of Giza. This will all be done from a island of mu, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will spontaneously combust, as countless hordes of robot warriors hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must release your time machine, bringing about pain, suffering, the usual. Your name shall become synonymous with dear god no, and no man will ever again dare fire you. Everyone will bow before your extraordinary charisma, and the world will have no choice but to lavish endless praise on your misdeeds.

I love this crap

Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Widespread Misery.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Mom never loved me

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first traumatize a superman. This will cause the world to slaughter a sacred calf to appease the gods, baffled by your arrival. Who is this despoiler of all that is good and nice and true? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a supervillain costume with gimmicks?


Stage Two
Next, you must obliterate that Opera House in Sydney. This will all be done from a haunted woods, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will wet their pants, as countless hordes of animal minions (rats, birds, etc.) hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must tauntingly wave your opening of the seven seals, bringing about the dead rising from the grave. Your name shall become synonymous with the spice girls, and no man will ever again dare refuse to be your prom date. Everyone will bow before your mystical abilities, and the world will have no choice but to worship the ground you walk on.