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What's your most embarrassing moment?

I'll kick this off with one of mine.

First and foremost... I'm the king of stupid. If something dumb can be done, I'm your man! This curse is a source of constant entertainment for those around me.

Three years ago, when I got my Honda ACE, I did something profoundly stupid.

It was after work and I was standing in the parking lot. I had started my bike and was waiting for it to warm up. I had new leathers on and a brand new Nolan helmet (a gloss black Italian full face helmet where the whole front opens up). As I had a moment or two to kill, I opened the helmet and lit a cigarette.

I took about two puffs off of my smoke when the motorcycle was warmed up and ready to go. I reached down, shoved in the choke, and then closed my helmet.

My cigarette (I smoke 100's) was shoved to the back of my mouth, burning cinders in my goate, and what was left of the cherry was now on my lips.

Imagine, if you will, a man covered in black leather who's trying to look cool, jumping all around his motorcycle while doing his "OMFG!! HEAD ON FIRE!!!" dance.

It took a bit to get the helmet open, spit out the cigarette I had just attempted to ingest, and brush all the glowing bits out of my beard.

I like this thread...by your standards mine isn't that bad...but my family still teases me about this one..

When I was quite young, sometime around my 8th birthday, I had a sit up test I had to do in school, I don't even remember why. The next day I woke up with sore stomach muscles...At breakfast, I told my Dad "I think I strained my Liver!"

Its been 29 fucking years...and I still hear about it. Of course, my sister remembers a license plate from the trip we took between the summer of my 3rd and 4th grade years...eh, so do I, WAX 013. Memory isn't really a problem in my family. You can actually ask my sister this question totally out of the blue "what's that license plate number", she'll spit it out without even hesitating.

Ok, my friend Darren and I were at the skating rink. Being as we were in the 5th grade, we were having a blast trying to trip each other. He made me stumble a little, but I recovered to send him veering into the carpeted wall. Proud of my victory, I was turned laughing at him when I observed his look of fustration turn to a broad grin. I turned around just quickly enough to plant my nose in the ass of a rather obese woman. I was knocked to the floor, flat on my back. The ass had actually completely reversed my momentum from counter to clockwise.

As I lay on the floor, with colored lights blinking and discoball spinning in the background, she hovered above me asking, "are you alright?" Also in my line of sight was Darren, laughing his head off and pointing at me.

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And RD, I have a similar story to the situps. The morning after mine, I woke up and had the 5th grade equivalent of a six pack. I went in to show my mom, thinking "I've turned into some sort of superhero."

My mom merely told me to go put some pants on.

Heh... I remember you telling me that at SSI.